People think that a good conversationalist (健谈的人) should be an attentive (专注的) listener. Ask questions that other people will enjoy answering. Encourage them to talk about themselves and what they have done. Diogenes, the Greek philosopher (哲学家) also said, "The reason why we have two ears and only one mouth is so that we may listen more and talk less!"
Try listening! Here are some examples about listening: (A neighbour of mine is talking about her child) "One evening last week I was sitting with Hannah, and she said to me, 'You are a smart Mum!' And I said, 'Why do you say that suddenly?' And she said, 'Although you are always busy, you always stop what you are doing to listen to me.'"
"You have to force your buyer to talk, to enter the conversation, if you expect successful sale, the only way you can do this is to stop talking yourself and listen." (From How to Talk Your Way to Success in Selling) Airline employees are taught how to listen to complaints. If they are able to show sympathy (同情心) and to listen for long enough, the passengers' problems will begin to seem less important.
Psychologists (心理学家) and doctors also know that listening is part of their job. If they listen with care and concern, the patient may even solve the problem himself! Here is some advice they give：
⒈Show the other person that you are listening.
⒉Look at them.
⒊Smile and nod quite often.
⒋Shake your head or raise your eyebrows if you don't follow what they are saying.
⒌Don't tap your foot because this will show impatience.
⒍Don't look at your watch unless you really have to know the time.
A good listener has the ability to make people feel good, and is as valuable at a party as a good talker. But just listening isn't enough. One should listen intelligently by trying to find out what the other person would really like to talk about.
